Holiday Party Train

Save energy by getting on the holiday party train! Keeping a few simple items on hand during the holidays will let you throw a party together in minutes.

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Everyone I know is stressed from mid-November until after New Years. There are too many people to see, too many details to handle, and too many pageants to attend. And yet, we want to see our family and friends. We look forward to time together.

This fall, I improved my back porch with new stairs, privacy screens, and composite decking. It’s still quite warm most afternoons and I love sitting there. When holiday activity and friends’ curiosity about the porch naturally fell in line, I accidentally happened on easy entertaining.

Well, truthfully, it started before the porch was complete. My evolving strategy began when I brined some green cherry tomatoes from my garden to create tomolives. They were a delicious bite with an olive beginning and surprise citrus finish. I wanted to show some off in martinis. I invited some people over to sit on the porch and drink martinis.

The first event was small and went well. I made a pitcher of martinis and a cheese plate patterned off one in That Cheese Plate Will Change Your Life. Everyone had a wonderful time. In the process, I learned a few things: 1)I didn’t need to worry about making plenty of martinis in advance. They didn’t suffer from being made in bulk. As long as I keep them in the freezer, I can serve them at another party. 2)I had cheese plate items left that could easily expand into another party. 3)With some minor alterations, I could minimize trips back to the kitchen.

I took what I’d learned and ran with it. In the past 2 ½ weeks, I’ve hosted 4 gatherings of various sizes on my new porch and one on someone else’s – all with very little effort. I’ve always said you should have two parties back-to-back. Now I’m thinking it’s a breeze to create a holiday train.

Here’s how to make it easy:

Have one drink that can be made in advance. I like dirty martinis. They’re made to be served ice cold so they can be stored in the freezer and saved for the next party if you make too much. For 8 drinks, I use 2 ½ cups Hendricks gin, ½ cup Dolin dry vermouth, ½ cup tomolive (or olive) brine, and ½ cup water. I freeze this in a beaker style pitcher (make sure it’s freezer safe glass and cover with plastic wrap) and/or a bottle and serve in chilled glasses. Both the beaker and bottle will fit in my vintage ice bucket so once the first round of drinks is poured, the rest sits on ice to minimize my trips inside.

Make more than you need. The second party is easy if the drinks are already made. Make two batches and leave the leftovers in the freezer.

Grab some premixed canned cocktails. Canned cocktails don’t require glasses and can be served out of an ice chest along with bottled water and some mini soft drinks. For the holiday party train, I keep flavored vodka sodas and ginger ale in the refrigerator. I also have a bottle of vodka and some club soda on hand just in case.

Have a bottle of red and bottle of white wine on hand. I don’t open the wine in advance but am happy to if someone doesn’t want a cocktail.

Consider beer. I don’t typically offer beer. In order to enjoy any leftovers, I’d have to serve gluten-free beer. There’s only an occasional beer drinker in my circles so it isn’t usually missed.

On the food front, mix and match from things like:

Cheese: Feta, Manchego, parmesan, fresh mozzarella (balls); Baked brie with raspberry preserves

Meat: Salami, prosciutto

Fresh veggies: Cucumbers, tomatoes

Pickles: Olives, capers, gherkins

Spreads/Dips: Hummus, tzatziki, pimento cheese

Roasted, salted, nuts: Pistachios, cashews

Dried fruit: Dates, figs, cherries

Fresh fruit: peaches, pears, grapes, blackberries

Herbs: Parsley, basil

Crackers/bread: Pita chips, crackers, mini naan

Sweets: Shortbread cookies, dark chocolate, chocolate covered cherries

Holiday related: Party mix, sausage balls

Throw away plates.  I like to use real chilled glasses for martinis and I have a ton of serveware, but sometimes it’s nice to throw away the plates and napkins. If you want some classy throw-aways, take a look at Smarty Had a Party.

That’s it. That’s all you need. You’ll be amazed how many parties you can serve by mixing and matching a few of the ingredients above into irresistible platters. Add a martini and light some candles. You can throw a whole party together in a few minutes with very little notice.

Drinks in the freezer and mix and match ingredients let you ride the holiday party train without adding stress to an already stressful time.

Happy Holidays!

https://www.cooking2thrive.com/blog/wintery-celebrations/

When You Least Feel Like a Party is When You Need One

tableWhen you least feel like a party is when you need one most. I’m tired. My sons are worn out. The holidays are here with family expectations to fill. Sounds like a nightmare! So what am I doing? Planning a party. Have I lost my mind? Maybe, but here’s what I’m thinking…

It’s been an unusual year. I lost my mother. With that my sister & I inherited 3 tenants and numerous properties to clean up and oversee. I inherited my 96-year-old cousin’s care. Soon after, she broke her leg. She’s been to the hospital, rehab, temporary long-term care, rehab, and now to permanent long-term care. Add her house to the properties I’m maintaining — all of which are 3 hours away from where I live.

My ex-husband lost his mother. My kids lost two grandmothers. One son got married 1700 miles away just a month after the other had a baby. I had to be at each place for each event. One son starts finals today for his 5th semester in law school. The other one is working 18 hours a day to please some difficult clients.

I’ve traveled many times, accommodated extended family, sorted boxes of papers, dealt with appraisers, lawyers, and bankers, gathered information for 4 tax returns, and now keep my 4-month-old grandson two to three days a week. Oh, and I work.

Blah, blah, blah. The point is, we’re all stretched so thin physically, intellectually, and emotionally, we’re not much help to each other. In order to keep our sanity, we all have to be focused on self-care and being patient with each other. I won’t say it’s easy. I certainly won’t say it’s fun.

Which brings me back to the party planning. In my previous job, I had lots of people contact. In my current job, I have very little. Most of my people time is spent with the helpless. While I’m not a full-time care giver, I am experiencing some of the isolation that can result from overwhelming obligations at home. I recognize that I need more lighthearted moments, more joy, more fun!

I am not alone. In the US, about 43.5 million people have provided unpaid care to a child or adult in the past 12 months. About 75% of those are women. Unpaid caregivers report that positive activities in their daily lives are reduced by 27.2% as a result of caregiving activities.(1) And the truth is, when you’re emotionally and physically exhausted, it’s harder to enjoy anything.

I have no patience left for immature or selfish behavior. I don’t even have the energy to get mad about it. It just reduces me to tears which makes it even harder to socialize. I feel like I have to have my guard up or I might start crying. I have plenty of tears. I hold them in when I’m encouraging my cousin to overcome her fear and try to stand. I hold them in when the long-term care facility staff tries to push me into changing doctors. I hold them in when the facility staff can’t find the time to call me when the doctor’s orders change, but can call and email me repeatedly over internal staff gossip. I hold them in when we have to remain on the waiting list at a better facility for months and months.

Aware of the sheer number of tasks I must accomplish and the stress they bring, I regularly prioritize eating healthy, exercise, and rest. I recognize I must or I’ll be consumed by the weight of the responsibilities. What I haven’t done as well is spend time with people who renew me. While it may be lumping them altogether, a party seems like a good way to spend some time with my friends and have some fun. With a little planning, I think I can pull off an event that leaves me more energized than exhausted.

First, I’m carefully choosing the participants. I only want to invite people with whom I feel I can be myself. I am including those who leave me feeling upbeat. I am leaving for another time, friends who require emotional support themselves, special treatment to avoid offending them, and anyone who leaves me feeling drained for any reason. I’m not hesitating to include people I don’t know well, but who I feel good about. This can help me expand my circle of support.

Second, I’m partnering with some friends. My house is filled with baby stuff and I don’t have time to decorate for the holidays. A friend has agreed to host at her house. That eliminates clean-up and decorating time for me! The other friend travels for work, so she can run by the liquor store and provide drinks. Both are inviting their friends. I have an opportunity to meet new people who may turn out to be new friends.

Third, we’re throwing this together the week of the party. That means no time to build it up in my mind into something big. It also means I’m texting the invitations and not worrying about who can or can’t show up.

Fourth, I’m choosing food I can prepare in advance over a period of days. With one friend hosting and another bringing the drinks, much of the food falls to me. I’m keeping it simple. Party mix, sausage balls, and individual panna cotta topped with leftover cranberry/orange relish. I have milk and cream left from Thanksgiving so this is a great chance to use it.

I can supplement with a relish tray, some Wholly Guacamole with chips, and fresh veggies with hummus purchased from the store. Since I’ll be providing the food, I know there are plenty of gluten-free choices. That means I don’t have to worry about pre-eating or carrying food for me in my purse.

Finally, I intend to be mindful and present at the party. I want to fully experience the friends who show up. And, I intend to be open to receiving. If someone compliments me, I will take a moment to feel and appreciate the compliment. If someone offers assistance, help, or relief, I will accept it. If something is funny, I’ll laugh. I will not make anyone else’s enjoyment my responsibility. I will express appreciation to those I appreciate.

Yes, it can feel like a stretch for me to plan a frivolous event right now, but I know it’s important to my long-term mental and physical health and my family isn’t available to help at the moment. If I can shoulder the care of helpless relatives, I can undertake some self-care on my own behalf. It is not selfish. It is necessary.

If you have a caregiver in your family, please give them a break this holiday season. Don’t complain if the house isn’t decorated, a large meal isn’t planned, your present isn’t exactly what you wanted, or if they don’t want (or do want) to discuss how things are going at the dinner table.

Instead, do the dishes, take a shift with the person for whom they care, express appreciation even if it’s just for the effort it took to get you a gift and wrap it, invite them to a party or, better yet, plan a party for them ’cause when they least feel like a party is when they need one most.

1) https://www.caregiver.org/caregiver-statistics-demographics

Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”