Tips – Page 2 – in thriver words

Toss It

With new gifts filling your house, should you keep your old stuff or toss it? I grew up in a family that used the same pieces of Christmas wrap for 10 or 15 years. We weren’t allowed to tear open a package. We carefully cut along the tape or lifted it gently, refolded the paper, and stored it away for another year.

African American woman in front of black background looking surprised while holding a small present with lid open.

The fact that we held onto things is evident in the houses I’ve cleaned out and the building I’m still emptying. I’ve rented multiple 30- and 40-yard dumpsters – 5 just for stuff my mother accumulated. Two of those equaled over 10,000 pounds of trash.

As gifts arrive, it’s a great time to contemplate another round of tossing. As I do, I’m reminded that I like feeling prepared. But do I really need another insulated tumbler, or do I just hate washing the one I have?

So when it comes to a specific item, how do you decide whether to keep it or toss it?

Determining what to keep can begin with a few simple questions…

Does this item feed me or weigh me down?
Do I use this item or is its value sentimental?
Would someone in my family value this more than I do?
Is the item in disrepair?
Would cash serve me better at this moment?
Could the item help someone?
How long have I had this without using it?
Can it be replicated digitally then disposed of?
Does this thing fit my current lifestyle?
Am I hanging onto something based on wishful thinking?
Has the tech become outdated?
Is it something my family or neighbors can collectively use?
Do I have more than one thing that serves this purpose?
Have I received an updated version?
Can it be repurposed and will I repurpose it?

How you answer these questions will make some answers obvious. If something weighs you down, toss it. If something has mostly sentimental value, a photo may suffice. If the item is in disrepair and you determine that you aren’t willing, or can’t afford to, fix it, give it away (or sell it).

While I don’t want to hang onto every little thing, I like the feeling of being prepared. I hate the feeling of being wasteful. I keep the best boxes throughout the year to use for gifts during the holiday season. I keep small flowerpots when I repot to larger ones. I have a collection of Allen wrenches I’ve saved from furniture assembly just in case a bolt comes loose.

I have jumper cables plus a rechargeable jump starter. I don’t plan to get rid of them because I’ve loaned them to two neighbors in the last month.

On the other hand, there’s a window seat, cedar chest, and box of small antiques that are nagging me to sort and toss. If I don’t finish those before the end of the year, I want to make sure they are included in my 2026 calendar.

Actually scheduling a toss out reminds me that as long as I don’t replace at the same rate I toss, I have more time for fun. It also allows me to take advantage of free recycling events.

I wish you lots of lovely gifts this holiday season, but when one isn’t for you, don’t be afraid to toss it to someone else.

Happy Holidays!

Check The Recipe Twice

Before you begin cooking, pretend you’re Santa and check the recipe twice. My grandmother taught me to read all recipes before I start cooking, but when I have to purchase ingredients, once isn’t always enough.

Asian mother and daughter looking at recipe on laptop while preparing salad.

This week I have an assigned appetizer to prepare for a party. It’s not a Cooking2Thrive recipe or even one from my family stash. It’s something I’ve never prepared before. Without any idea how the dish tastes, and a prescribed expectation, I feel more compelled to avoid substitutions if possible.

Okay, in truth I’m always open to substitutions. I’m just trying to deliver what the party organizer is expecting. But I know me, so I can’t realistically assert I won’t have some last-minute inspiration I have to follow. Nonetheless, I plan to begin with the ingredients and amounts listed in the recipe she provided.

Gathering ingredients is one reason to check a recipe twice, but not the only one. I store my serving dishes in a less than airtight built-in china cabinet. (Pretty sure outside air leaks in through the ancient corners.) That means I have to choose and wash my serving dishes before I can use them.

I may even need to wash the baking dish I’ll use since those are stored in various locations and used with varying frequency. Checking the recipe helps me choose the dishes, tools, and serving utensils I need. Collecting and cleaning those in advance helps me stay on schedule the day of an event.

This week, I also have company coming so I want to minimize the time my party dish takes away from our time to do other things. Reading the recipe again lets me assess whether there are pieces of it I can prepare in advance without affecting the quality of the end product.

I this case, I’m making roasted garlic caprese dip. The thing that takes the most oven time is roasting the garlic and shallots. I can easily do this the day before, rewarm while I roast the tomatoes, and reduce the day of event time by 40 minutes. That’s 40 minutes my guests and I can spend in our favorite neighborhood bookstore.

Prepping some items in advance is a practice that can reduce stress any time you’re entertaining. I have chili in the freezer that I’ll thaw to serve my out-of-town guests. I’m going to add beans. They’re dried so they have to be soaked and cooked in advance as well. I’ll need to allow an overnight soak and about an hour for cooking. If you have an instant pot, you’ll need less time.

This morning, I’m checking the dip recipe against the ingredients in my shopping cart. I’ll check it again to make a timeline. And I’ll check it a third time when I gather my baking and serving dishes.

At the end of the week, I’ll be prepared to finish my dish in minimal time so I can enjoy my guests. All in all, I’ll most likely read the recipe four times. That’s just me. If the recipe is familiar, I’d be tempted to skip all but one, but experience tells me it’s good to check the recipe twice.

Time for Reflection

As December begins, we can create the time for reflection. The holidays are a great time to slow down, reflect on how things have gone, and determine some things we’d like to improve next year. Instead, we may get caught in a frenzy of holiday activities that keeps us running ourselves ragged. With a little effort now, you can prevent an avalanche of tasks that keep you from having time to reflect when you get a few days off.

Make a list and finish your shopping. If you haven’t finished your Christmas shopping, finish it now. Today is Cyber Monday and a great time to find a discount. This task will go faster and remain more budget friendly if you make a list and stick to it.

Start wrapping immediately. You don’t have to wrap all the gifts in one day but start soon after you purchase them. Take an hour or two each night while you’re watching TV to wrap your gifts. You can make this task go faster by getting the children to help.

Cut decorations down to the essential. Use a lighted wreath on the door in place of strands of lights on the house. Hang stockings and decorate one tree, but forego garland, extra candles, Christmas villages, and extra trees.

Prepare the guest room. If you have people coming to stay, go ahead and locate the extra blankets and pillows. Locate the blowup beds. Change the linens or put them with the temporary mattresses to save time later.

Create a general menu. Once you have a sense of the items you want to serve, create a backward timeline that allows for bundling tasks, prepping, and/or freezing in advance.

Premix pancakes, waffles, biscuits, rolls, or cinnamon rolls. When you must avoid wheat or other grains, you can’t always pick up a mix or prepared product at the last minute. Instead of waiting until guests start arriving, premix the dry ingredients for baked goods you plan to make. Put the mixes in clearly labelled containers and print out, or bookmark, the recipes so you can finish them quickly.

Carefully choose parties. How many times have you attended some event that drains you? Perhaps you can forego some of the usual events in favor of greater investment in the ones that are meaningful.

Mix your friends. I had a friend who religiously refused to mix groups of friends. Ironically, most of us knew each other. When we gathered for his memorial party, it was easy to see how silly the rule had been. Minimize the number of days you’re busy by inviting groups you might not normally pair. You may discover they mesh wonderfully. If not, you’ll probably get an interesting story!

Practice mindfulness. If you hurry through the holidays or busy yourself to avoid bad memories or trauma triggers, this is a great time to ground and breathe.

Ditch regret. Some of us spend time and energy punishing ourselves for the things we regret. Spending time reflecting summons all those demons adding fuel to the flame. This is time and energy wasted. We all do things we regret. We can’t undo them. The best we can do is learn and do better next time.

Reflection is both a time to learn from mistakes and a time to revel in all the good, serendipitous, heartwarming things this year brought us. Fully embracing the good bolsters us for any difficulty we may face next year. Reflection is an excellent ingredient in the recipe for fortitude.

Gluten-Free Friendsgiving

Help your gluten-sensitive friends out with a gluten-free Friendsgiving. Using slight alterations, you can keep a traditional menu while making it safe for your gluten-sensitive friends. Here are some quick tips and tricks.

Overhead view of table with rolls, pumpkin pie, roll plates, hands, and maple leaves.

Make cornbread stuffing instead of bread stuffing. Cornbread stuffing is more common than bread stuffing in the South so this substitution is not a total break from tradition. Be sure not to add wheat flour to the cornbread or use a GF cornbread mix.

Use gluten-free soup in green bean casserole. You can make the soup or purchase a canned gluten-free version. Top the casserole with crushed potato chips or potato stix to add the crunch you’d normally get from French fried onions.

Leave off the bread crumbs. If another casserole calls for bread crumbs, substitute gluten-free ones, potato chips, potato stix, or cheese (if appropriate).

Offer vinegar and oil with salad. In addition to your favorite bottled dressing, include vinegar and oil as a safe gluten-free option.

Serve gravy on the side. If you don’t want to worry with gluten-free gravy, just serve it on the side rather than atop the food.

Use corn starch to thicken. Gravy and pie filling can be thickened with corn starch rather than flour and you probably already have some in your pantry. In reality, many pie filling recipes won’t have to be altered. And if you don’t want to use corn starch in gravy, get some sweet white sorghum flour to substitute for wheat flour.

Buy gluten-free dinner rolls. Truth is, most of us who are gluten-free are used to being flexible. You don’t have to have rolls available, but you can find yeast rolls on the Katz website https://katzglutenfree.com/ or at stores like Natural Grocers if you want to put some on the table.

Purchase a pre-made gluten-free pie crust. Don’t worry about buying gluten-free flour and making pie crust. There are several brands and several kinds of pre-made crusts available including cookie and graham cracker-like versions.

Make banana pudding. Desserts don’t get much easier than banana pudding. Use instant vanilla pudding, (check the label for safe ingredients) substitute heavy whipping cream for half the milk, layer the pudding and banana with gluten-free vanilla wafers or animal cookies. Boom – delicious dessert in minutes. If you want it to look fancier, you can always add some whipped cream on top.

Take a photo of the label. If you aren’t sure how to spot things that contain gluten when you’re reading a label, just take a photo of the label before you leave home with your dish so you can share it later if someone asks about ingredients.

Friendsgiving is about enjoying connections and expressing gratitude. Luckily, you don’t have to spend tons of extra time in the kitchen. Make these easy adjustments and enjoy your party!

Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”