This excruciating year is winding down and now it’s time to decide. Will we use the disruptions of 2020 as an opportunity to learn and improve, or will we dig in our heels and double down on pre-pandemic positions? Will we choose to explore our values and priorities and then realign our lives around them, or will we claw our way back to a sense of 2019 normal? What we make of this year is not up to a new administration or a health crisis. What we make of this year is up to us.
I’ve seen the resignation on faces. I’ve heard it in voices. It feels as though many of us see ourselves as helpless right now. Being resigned to helplessness is a slippery slope. If we are helpless then what we do doesn’t matter so we may as well do whatever we want and consequences be damned.
Sometimes our thinking isn’t so blatantly rebellious. We just reason our way around anything that might shake our established beliefs. And it happens so quickly we don’t even know we’re doing it. Perhaps it’s normal when faced with uncertainty to grab onto the nearest comfort or run from new thoughts. I’m not sure.
I am certain what we do makes a difference even when we can’t immediately see the results. So as we wind down this year in the midst of an accelerating health crisis, I encourage you to trust yourself enough to approach the coming year with the belief that what you do matters.
Most of us can change one thing we never believed we could change. In changing that one thing, we open the door for vast positive contributions to our selves, our families, and our communities.
If you have trouble making that leap, try asking yourself the questions below. Then take one of the answers and do it. It doesn’t have to look like anything you’ve thought of before. It doesn’t have to be accomplished to any certain standard. Just think of this as a learning experience.
Let’s begin the experience of learning to make a difference:
What’s one thing I’ve learned about myself in 2020 that surprised me?
Is there a way I can use that knowledge to improve my life or my community?
What’s one thing I am willing to give up so that I have time for ___________(that thing you say you want to do but never get around to)?
What’s one thing I am willing to give up to help my friend?
What’s one thing I’d do differently if I felt appreciated?
What’s one thing I’d do differently if I felt like part of a winning team?
What’s one thing I can do that will make my life better?
What’s one thing I can do that will make my family’s life better?
What’s one thing I can do that will make a friend’s life better?
What’s one thing I can do that will make a stranger’s life better?
What’s one thing I would do if I were brave?
What’s one ability I have that I can use differently?
What’s the worst thing I’ve ever done? If my friend did that, would I forgive them?
What can I do to be a better listener?
What’s one thing I’m willing to say no to?
What’s one unexplored solution to an ongoing problem?
What’s one feeling I always avoid and what would change if I felt it?
What’s one habit I want to give up?
What’s one habit I want to develop?
Yes, these are simple questions. But so often we fail to take the first step toward significant improvement or significant contribution because we imagine the task as so large that we resign ourselves to failure. But once change has begun, it’s just a matter of commitment and time before you see that what you’ve done has made a difference.
Knowing you can make a difference even in the worst of circumstances will equip you to weather any storm that changes your life’s course without the need to control the outcome. I know it may just sound like words right now, but try it. See what happens.
2021 is upon us. Like 2020 it will not be a cakewalk. We can choose to make a difference and become captains of our own destiny, or we can hold back and feel helpless. If you’re not sure which way to go, now is the time to decide.
I choose to make a difference.
