{"id":4166,"date":"2020-10-27T14:24:28","date_gmt":"2020-10-27T19:24:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/?p=4166"},"modified":"2020-10-27T14:24:30","modified_gmt":"2020-10-27T19:24:30","slug":"free-your-mind","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/free-your-mind\/","title":{"rendered":"Free Your Mind"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u201cFree your mind and the rest will follow.\u201d<\/em> 1<\/sup><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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Remember that song, \u201cFree Your Mind\u201d from the 1990s? It\u2019s\nseared into my memory by a moment on the dance floor. I looked to my right and grooving\nto En Vogue as if she had not a care in the world was a woman about to go on\ntrial for killing her husband. I knew her from the pictures that were plastered\non the front of my newspaper every day. I felt shocked, amazed, and somehow\nchallenged\/inspired. Even if she was innocent, how could she possibly feel free\nenough to fully enjoy that moment?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve come back to this question from time to time in the\nensuing decades. I inherently understand that no matter what has happened or\nwhat other people think, my thoughts are mine. And I\u2019m happy letting my mind\nroam free. But understanding on a deeper level why she could dance freely in a\nsituation in which I would be more likely to hide requires an exploration of the\nemotions, training, and thinking that limit me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Exploring these has led me to some thoughts on how can\nfreeing your mind improve your life. Here are a few:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You cannot control anyone but yourself.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

The dancing alleged murderer could not control the crime\ninvestigation, the newspaper reports, her employer (who fired her the minute\nshe was arrested without waiting to see if she was guilty), or any of us on the\ndance floor. She could only control herself. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Attempting to impose limits on someone else so that they\nwill conform to you is futile. When you change yourself, everything around you\nwill shift. Sometimes this may be joyfully in the direction you desire. Other\ntimes it will be painful. I witnessed a moment of joy on that dance floor. No\nmatter what my training said about an alleged criminal enjoying life with\nabandonment, that moment was inspiring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For everything you think you know about someone, you don\u2019t know much unless you\u2019re willing to invest.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

So often we make choices based on people\u2019s outward presentation.\nThis limits our choices for friendships, romantic partners, employees, and\ncaregivers. The caregiver who treats you with kindness, gentleness, affection, and\nrespect may use bad grammar or vote for another political party. The well-read,\nwell-spoken, impeccably dressed professor may beat his wife.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My parents greatly diverged in their understanding of this\nconcept. Very few of my dad\u2019s friends were acceptable to my mother. They were\nmostly what you\u2019d call colorful characters that brought him laughter,\nadventure, and intellectual stimulation. My mother preferred socially acceptable\nappearance above all else. She missed many opportunities for expanding her\nthinking and enriching her life even within our extended family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Free your mind to visualize.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you learn to waterski, you also learn to fall. If you\ncan\u2019t get the falling out of your mind, you won\u2019t get it out of your muscle memory.\nWe accept that many sports require conquering the mind game. Life in general is\nno different. And just like you can improve your basketball shot by\nvisualizing, you can improve your chances of becoming successful at any goal\nusing the same technique.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m not saying that visualization will suddenly make me a\ngreat basketball player, but unless I can see the possibility of becoming one, I\u2019m\ndoomed before I start. Many of us have learned how to visualize failure. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most limits are self-imposed.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If your initial response to this statement is a four-letter\nword, that\u2019s not surprising. It\u2019s more enticing to believe that we are limited\nby outside forces. It is a fact that outside forces affect us and may change\nthe options, but they limit us less than we believe they do. When we let go of\nthe idea that outside forces control our fate, we are required to face our own\ndemons. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Taking responsibility for our limiting thoughts and behavior\nis much more emotionally difficult. It may require processing through anger,\ngrief, and loss. It may require a shift in self-image. It will require some decisions\nthat don\u2019t feel good. Letting go of self-imposed limits is not easy, but to the\ndegree it\u2019s hard it\u2019s also healing and rewarding.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Flip the script.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you understand the value of freeing your mind but aren\u2019t\nsure how to start seeing the possibilities, try flipping the script. For\nexample, instead of imagining only how awful you\u2019ll feel if you don\u2019t get the\njob you really want, imagine how great you\u2019ll feel when you do. Don\u2019t stop\nthere. Imagine days, months, and years filled with excitement and fulfillment.\nHold onto those thoughts and feelings until you feel a shift from anxiety to\nconfidence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is at that moment that the world of possibilities will\nopen. You don\u2019t need that particular job anymore. You want it, but it\u2019s not the\nonly gig in the world worth having. There are millions of opportunities. When\nyour mind is free to embrace all the options, you\u2019ll be free to see abundance\ninstead of scarcity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s not mind over matter. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For some this will work differently. If you have experienced significant trauma, you may need to free your body before you can free your mind. The two are significantly intertwined. There\u2019s nothing wrong with this and there are great tools to help \u2013 somatic experiencing therapy, EMDR<\/a>, and yoga for trauma are all great options for helping your body release so your mind can follow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another benefit of freeing your mind is problem solving will get easier. There are multiple solutions to any problem that presents itself. An open mind makes it possible to imagine creative and innovative approaches. Easier problem solving alone is a great reason to free your mind! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ll just dance my way out now. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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