![\"garden\"](\"http:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/c2tblog-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Azaleas-2015-3.jpg\")
My dad used to say it as if it were my full name, “Cheri, Cheri, quite contrary.” His version was, of course, a takeoff of the nursery rhyme in which the line that follows reads: “How does your garden grow?” I hear him again in my head each spring when my yard begins to bloom. Was he just being funny, or did my dad have a point? Am I contrary?<\/p>\n
I don’t think I’m really contrary, but I’m certainly contrarian. I don’t accept conventional wisdom without careful consideration. I gather loads of information before making a decision. I play devil’s advocate so that I can turn an idea around and see the other side. I’m not afraid to hang a jury. I can remain calm in the midst of a crisis because I focus on the next best step to take rather than on the idea that there’s a crisis. <\/p>\n
This mode of operating makes me feel as though I am strong, solid, resilient, and competent. Some people agree with this view. Others see my contrarian nature as a huge pain in the booty. And so it will always go. <\/p>\n
And that is why I don’t want to focus on that particular question. Whether or not I’m contrary is not important. In fact, I think we often get sidetracked by asking ourselves and our children the wrong questions. We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> We ask:<\/strong> Now, I’ll ask:<\/strong> If not, now’s a great time to change up the questions!<\/p>\n Cheri, Cheri, quite contrary? Depends on why you’re asking!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" My dad used to say it as if it were my full name, “Cheri, Cheri, quite contrary.” His version was, of course, a takeoff of the nursery rhyme in which the line that follows reads: “How does your garden grow?” I hear him again in my head each spring when my yard begins to bloom. … Continue reading “Cheri, Cheri, Quite Contrary”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[869,106,867,873,868,870,872,871],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1626"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1626"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1626\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1630,"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1626\/revisions\/1630"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1626"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1626"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cooking2thrive.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1626"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n<\/strong>
\nWe ask:<\/strong>
\nWhat do you want to be when you grow up – doctor, lawyer, engineer, programmer, professor, fireman, pilot, plumber…
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nHow do you want to be when you grow up – kind, courageous, motivated, knowledgeable, innovative, powerful, conscientious, loyal…<\/p>\n
\nWhat do you want to do – drive a truck, find a husband, play pro basketball, buy a big house…
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nWhat qualities do you want to contribute to the world – compassion, thoughtfulness, peacefulness, gratitude, generosity, honesty…<\/p>\n
\nWill your new job pay more?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nHow will your new job feel better to you than your previous job?<\/p>\n
\nIs your new job a career advancement?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nIs there something you want to learn from this new job?<\/p>\n
\nWill I start, Coach?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nHow do you think I can help the team, Coach?<\/p>\n
\nWhy doesn’t my husband do more around the house?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nWhy haven’t I thanked my husband for working so hard?<\/p>\n
\nWhy doesn’t my wife keep the toys picked up?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nI wonder if my wife would like some me time while I bathe the kids and pick up the toys?<\/p>\n
\nWhy do the other salesmen get all the leads?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nWhat can I do to make my customer’s day easier?<\/p>\n
\nShould I go to the party?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nWhat are my intentions in going to this party?<\/p>\n
\nWhy isn’t this partnership working?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nIf this partnership were to end, what would I want that process to look like?<\/p>\n
\nHow can I say no?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nHow can I say yes when it feels like I’m betraying myself?<\/p>\n
\nHow can I find the time to take care of myself?
\nInstead of asking:<\/strong>
\nHow can I take care of my family if I don’t take care of myself?<\/p>\n
\nAre the questions you’re asking helping you show up in the world in the manner you desire?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n