Posts tagged ‘thanksgiving’

November 19, 2018

Cough Drop Pep Talk for Thanksgiving?

Do I really need a cough drop pep talk for Thanksgiving? Why does my cough drop wrapper say, “A PEP TALK IN EVERY DROP” anyway? If I have fever high enough to think cough drops talk, I need something besides a pep talk. The pesky little ovals don’t stop there. They advise me to “Buckle down and push forth!”; “Power Through!”; and “Seize the day.” Whaaat?
coughdrop
Maybe I’m just in a bad mood because I can’t sleep, my throat hurts, and my ear is full of fluid. Eating green beans, cauliflower, sweet potatoes, and oranges may be culinary medicine, but they aren’t doing the trick to kick this virus. Now, I’m out of food and I don’t want to get out in the cold to go to the store.

Should I take the cough drop wrapper’s advice and power through? After all, I just have a cold, not the flu. OMG, I’m rhyming in a blog post – I must be sick. That aside, I don’t like clothes with affirmations on the tags or wrappers that tell me what to do. It’s not that I mind affirmations, I just don’t like them in my clothes. It makes me feel like a walking fortune cookie. And it’s not that I don’t sometimes need to be told to buck up, I just don’t want that advice from something I take when I’m sick. It seems inappropriate.

If the wrapper said, “A delicious complement to hot tea.” or “Stay home and sleep.” or “A warm snuggle for your throat!” or “Take time to heal.”, perhaps I could get behind wrapper advice. But telling me to be unstoppable is really bad advice when I’m ill.

The people following that advice are more likely to go to work, church, and the store, sick. They’re more likely to stay stick longer. They’re more likely to be too tired to do their best at work or be as safe a driver as usual on the road. And no doubt they will contaminate the air on my next flight. So stop encouraging them already!

Most of us have been programmed to keep going when we would get well faster if we went to bed and got some rest. We feel like we can’t miss work or class, a family birthday, or a soccer game. Many bosses are happy to reinforce this belief.

And then there’s all of that holiday cooking to be done! That’s certainly something we shouldn’t be doing when we’re sick. Seriously, preparing food for others when you’re sick can expose them. Most states have food prep guidelines for restaurant employees that include restrictions for those with cold, flu, and bronchitis as well as more serious illnesses.

I know it’s tempting to minimize the risks when we think of beloved holiday traditions, but if someone in your family has a compromised immune system, exposure to the flu could put them at serious risk even if they’ve had the vaccine. Having a medically fragile grandchild has increased my awareness of the need to be mindful about spreading germs. It also means I felt the frustration of missing out when the family welcomed her home from a recent hospitalization.

Perhaps those cough drop pep talks are meant to encourage malingering patients to get back to the business of every day, but they’re most likely to feed the determination of those who won’t stop in the first place. If we want to assist our immune systems, it is important to recognize the value of down time. Resting leaves our bodies with more energy available to fight off bugs and rebuild cells.

So, if you’re sick this holiday season, forget the cough drop pep talk! Eat some soup. Order food. Go to bed. Take time to heal. Not only will you get well faster in the long run, you’ll help contain the spread of viruses and/or bacteria.

Now it’s time for me to follow my own advice and take a healing nap!!!

http://www.moodmaybe.com/2016/05/flax-affirmations.html

https://www.gethalls.com/

https://www.cdc.gov/media/releases/2016/p0215-enough-sleep.html

http://www.health.state.mn.us/foodsafety/dwi/eicondguide.pdf

http://www.cooking2thrive.com/blog/easy-gluten-free-thanksgiving-menu/

http://www.cooking2thrive.com/blog/small-crowd-small-bird-cornish-game-hen-thanksgiving/

http://www.cooking2thrive.com/blog/hosting-thanksgiving-easy/

Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

November 24, 2015

Made with Love. Served with Kindness!

StuffingYou hear that the food always tastes better when it’s made with love! It seems to be true, but why mention it now? A lot of us are tying ourselves in knots preparing for this week’s Thanksgiving meal. In our heads, we hold an image of a large harmonious family gathered over a delicious meal composed of perfect replications of our great grandmother’s traditional recipes. We work ourselves into a frenzy to create a real world experience that matches this image. We focus on our expectations and feelings of obligation, then learn too late that along the way we have lost any feeling of connection and joy.

I’m thinking about this because I have a friend who just abandoned his car 2000 miles from home in a city where he was temporarily working, bummed some frequent flyer points and flew across the country to see family who had begged him to come home for the holiday. They picked him up at the airport and within five minutes began blasting him for not doing well because he doesn’t have as much money as he used to have before he lost his job of 15 years, his wife, and his large house. Soon after this berating, he called me.

For the first 8 minutes of the conversation, he mentioned none of this. He did not disclose that he was 2000 miles from where I thought he was, or that he was changing the plans we had made for this week. He accidentally let the story slip when I asked why he was breathing so loudly. As it turns out, he was walking 4 miles to get a ride from a friend. I was taken by surprise. He began explaining that he had made a last minute trip because his mom wasn’t doing well. I felt alarmed, assuming she must be in the hospital. Then he told me about the scolding she’d given him at the airport and how the guys at the gym were giving him trouble. Soooo, obviously, mom was well enough to go to the airport and he had been home long enough to work out. I felt confused. I started asking questions to try to make sense of the story. He still did not address our plans. As the details slowly revealed themselves, I was not pleased with him for failing to notify me of his change in plans and I may, or may not, have said, “There’s no excuse for that!” If I said it, I meant it. I believe I was right and I feel just fine about feeling angry with him.

At the same time, I recognize that it doesn’t matter how right I am, how disappointed, angry, annoyed, unimportant, or betrayed I feel. The bigger truth is that he is afraid and struggling, and, in spite of that, trying to accomplish the impossible task of pleasing all of the people he cares about. This often leads him to over promise and under deliver. While that could be called creating his own problem, my “no excuse” response did not make him feel loved, accepted, or supported. Reviewing the conversation, it seems clear that I have created a space in which I happily confirm for him that he’s not living up to expectations causing him to feel even more worthless and afraid to tell me the truth. That is a bigger problem than anything specific he has done. So while I may be technically right about the situation, I am woefully wrong at the same time.

This is a spot in which we often find ourselves. We are both right and wrong at the same time.
A coworker refuses to take on a task at work that belongs to a slacking worker and the company loses a customer because this task was left undone. What she did may have been technically right, but her choice was detrimental to the team overall.
A friend plans a move to Nashville to become a songwriter, but a mutual friend discourages him because for fear he may eventually have to move back home. Whether he stays home or moves back home isn’t really all that different, is it?
With her kids playing in the room, a neighbor screams to her best friend that her lousy husband cheated and she’d like to kill him. She may be right to feel the betrayal this strongly and to seek support from her friend, but expressing it this way in this situation, creates an environment of insecurity for her children. Can that be right?
A husband gets his kids every other Thanksgiving and it’s his year. He refuses to negotiate when the kids mom asks if he can switch out holidays this year so the kids can visit with her extended family that’s rarely together. Of course he’s within his rights to refuse, but is it the wrong thing to do?
Every time Uncle Paul sees his nephew, he reminds him, and the rest of the family, about the time he slept through Thanksgiving ’cause he was drunk. No matter that it was 10 years ago, then 12 years ago, then 15 years ago and he’s been sober 14 of those. Is Uncle Paul right about the facts, yes! Does it accomplish anything positive to bring it up now?
A woman in your Sunday School class doesn’t like her son’s girlfriend so she treats her politely while making sure to inform family and friends with a big eye roll that the girlfriend was once homeless, hasn’t finished college, uses bad grammar, and has been to, gasp, jail – all correct facts. She fails to remember to mention that the girlfriend has also had the same job for 5 years, is still in school, can sing like an angel, is an incredible artist, supports herself and the nephew she took in, and has never been charged with a crime. Does the portrait she has painted give the right impression?
A man misses his daughter’s evening wedding because his current wife’s daughter loses her house in a fire. Everyone lives in the same town, there were no injuries, and there is a 12 hour window in between events. Is it wrong to celebrate a joyous event in the face of a tragic one?
Aunt Betty never misses an opportunity to tell your sister she’s fat whenever there’s a family meal. She pointedly passes artificial sweetener when she asks for sugar and brings her an apple when she’s passing out pie to everyone else. Aunt Betty says she’s worried about your sister’s health. Your sister cringes every time Aunt Betty enters the room.

I’ll admit it’s sometimes difficult to determine when to challenge an affront and when to let it go because sometimes things that look the same on the surface are exactly opposite underneath, but let’s face it, most of the time it’s just easier for our egos to cling to being right, feeling angry, and lashing out than it is to admit we have been wrong or shortsighted. It takes insight, courage, and commitment to keep your heart open when loved ones let you down or make sure to let you know you’ve let them down. It may help to remember that we can all be right and still be wrong.

You’ll know you have a Thanksgiving made with love and served with kindness when:

• You feel no need to join the chorus when your mom and sister find fault with your brother’s wife who insisted on bringing cherry pie even though your mom told her not to. She also brought her big smile and warm hugs. The pie was just, you guessed it, the cherry on top.

• You notice that your grandmother always finds another place at the table for an unexpected guest without ever missing a beat.

• You discover that you want to forego a large menu and choose a few family favorites that you rarely have time to cook. If your husband loves slow-cooked ribs, you fix ribs! If your daughter has been raving about her friend’s mom’s chocolate lava cake, you forget the pecan pie and make chocolate lava cake. If your son likes pizza better than anything on the planet, you serve mini pizzas as an appetizer. And you make sure to include your favorite roasted cauliflower as well. You make these choices to deliberately show your family that you know and value their preferences. You feel at peace with your decision even when you happen to overhear a snide comment regarding the menu from a traditionalist cousin.

• You enjoy seeing your cousins so much that you hardly notice that your mom, who is angry with you, hasn’t put a single gluten-free item on the table other than turkey.

• You find yourself taking time to absorb the gratitude your family expresses for your efforts. You feel free to sit down and let your kids serve coffee and dessert or wash the dishes.

• You feel comfortable saying no to an 8 hour drive home for Thanksgiving during a time when you have been over obligated and feel that you need quiet renewal time. Will Aunt Helen say a few ugly things to your mother when you don’t show up? Possibly, but you know you are able to choose to let the bad behavior stop with her. You view your decision to stay home as a loving gift to yourself and your housemates.

• You feel more excited than disappointed when your mom encourages the family to volunteer at a shelter that feeds the community instead of maxing out a credit card to meet the expectation of a fancy meal.

• You find that you are beginning to show up for holiday events with your courage and boundaries intact and your defenses down.

• You feel free to gracefully let your reluctant relatives refuse your invitation to dinner and easily shift your focus to providing a fun experience for some close friends.

• You find that you are able to feel grateful for the gifts given you by your most difficult moments.

I am grateful for the insight I gained from the recognition of my shortsightedness. We wish you a holiday full of love, kindness, joy, gratitude, and delicious food!

Happy Thanksgiving!

November 22, 2014

Small Crowd? Small Bird! How about Cornish Game Hen for Thanksgiving?

Small Crowd? Small Bird! How about Cornish game hen for Thanksgiving? If the gathering at your Thanksgiving table this year will be small, then maybe it’s a good time to downsize the meal to fit.
Cornish Hen
Perhaps I’m thinking this because I’m short, drove a MiniCooper for 10 years, or because I love small things. It’s really probably more closely related to the fact that I recently saw the documentary, “Just Eat It”. This movie explores food waste on the farm, in the retail food chain and in our own refrigerators. That, coupled with the fact that only Ben and I will be home this year, has me leaning toward paring down my shopping list beginning with the bird. Of course, I’ve let time get away from me so paring things down makes even more sense with less than a week to the event and no real plan in place.

The great thing about cooking with fresh ingredients is that when you’re short on planning, shopping, or prep time, you can let the food speak for itself without a lot of embellishment. Yesterday, my hairdresser told me she uses orange marmalade diluted with orange juice to baste Cornish game hens that she has seasoned with salt & pepper and larded with butter. She bakes for 15 minutes at 375% and then starts basting every 7 or 8 minutes with the orange marmalade until the bird is fully cooked (an additional 35-45 minutes). That sounds easy enough.

Instead of stuffing, I can make a rice pilaf with red bell pepper, orange zest, peas, raisins, and nuts. I already have a butternut squash and a head of cabbage. I’ll peel, boil, and mash the butternut squash with a little salt, butter, and cream and boil the cabbage in some chicken broth. Ta da! That’s plenty of food for the two of us.
Butternut Squash

Oh wait. Since it’s a holiday, maybe I should add dessert. What’s quick, easy, and small? My first thought is banana pudding. I can use instant vanilla pudding made with half & half (the generic store brand is gluten-free) layered with Mi-Del animal cookies plus perfectly ripe bananas. I’ve done this before. It takes about 5 minutes and it’s delicious. We like to call it Bananimal pudding.

Panna cotta is also an option. I love it served in my grandmother’s sherbet glasses topped with fresh raspberries. The only part that takes much time is the chilling. Since my refrigerator is happy to take care of this without any assistance from me, it fits my definition of quick.

Another possibility is to throw together a microwave spoon bread filled with berries or chocolate, or both. All I need is in an almond flour base, an egg, sweetener, a little baking soda, then some spices and berries. The result is another dessert that’s ready in less than 15 minutes.

By implementing my pared down plan, I’m also saving myself some headaches at the grocery store. If I needed traditional ingredients, I might face empty displays since I’ve waited until the last minute.

While it would be great to have the whole family together, I’m not lacking things for which to be thankful. I think I’ll add this scaled down Thanksgiving meal plan to the list.


Disclosure of Material Connection: I have not received any compensation for writing this post. I have no material connection to the brands, products, or services that I have mentioned. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

November 22, 2013

Gratitude Is My Best Defense

Today I’m going to share my gratitude list. Yes, next week is Thanksgiving, but don’t be fooled, this post is only inadvertently timely. I am struggling. I can see that I’m not functioning as well as I usually do.

In an attempt to stay focused on a healthy routine, I headed for the lap pool yesterday. When I got in the shower at the gym, I discovered my swimsuit was on backward. I KNOW. I’m not sure how you can put a swimsuit on backward either, but I did it! How distracted am I? Leaving, I forgot to change out of my pool shoes, and then I almost hit a pole in the parking lot.

What has me feeling so discombobulated? A perfect storm of L-I-F-E. We all have them. Mine happens to be accompanied by the worst dermatitis herpetiformis (DH) I’ve ever had. I’d say at least 3/4 of my body is covered in the unbearably itchy rash. It is wearing me out and driving me to distraction at a time when I feel like I need to be on top of my game.

I’m usually full of solutions, but right now I simply don’t know what to do. I feel vulnerable and alone. The best defense I have against becoming overwhelmed is to focus on something for which I’m grateful.

So…I am grateful…

 That my mom was released from the hospital yesterday

That I took my truck in before the universal joint totally fell apart and left me stranded

That there is chili in the fridge so that I don’t have to cook dinner

For sea salt caramel gelato

That my plants haven’t died even though I’ve neglected them

That I have a back scratcher when I can’t stand to leave this rash alone

That my new walking shoes are finally feeling comfortable

For Nutella

For the smell of cinnamon rolls

For silver jewelry with filigree

For purple, and orange, and paisley

That it’s raining outside

For soft clothes

For funky eyeglasses

For crushed ice

For warm blankets

For laughter

For books

For the approaching holidays

For snow

Anyone else feel like this? Want to join me? What are you grateful for?